I failed. I gave myself a simple challenge: 40 days of yoga (asana) in a row. I was allowed to count my teaching days, if I would demo everything and would do all the poses myself. There is a little difference (the breathing) with just doing yoga myself or attending a class, but you can’t win all. This time I totally didn’t win. I failed. I was close by, but close by isn’t good enough. Well for me it wasn’t.
I know yoga is not about achieving and the 40 days were also not a big must, but I didn’t do the challenge for nothing. It’s so easy to start something up, to keep doing it is way harder. Now I have some excuses why I didn’t make it; even real good ones, but they are not more than excuses. So I sold my school, so I was going on a trip around the world to teach yoga and work as a yoga instructor and massage therapist, so I was finishing my studies as massage therapist, so I was leaving my house and selling everything I had and so I didn’t have enough time to do everything, still I should have made it.
The stupid thing of all is that I felt one days before I finished the challenge. I had a few narrow escapes. There were days I started my yoga practice just before twelve o’clock in the evening and was only finished somewhere around midnight, but at least I did those days yoga. But the Friday and the Saturday before I left, day 39 and 40, I didn’t make it. I had so much on my mind, so much to do, to arrange, so many emotions to deal with I failed. And yes, I did sang mantras on day 39, but that simply doesn’t count for me. The challenge was 40 days of asana. Singing mantras is no asana and 38 days is no 40.
I have been doing yoga ever since. The Sunday after the day I failed, I gave a yoga concert at Theaters Tilburg and did some yoga, killing time at Frankfurt airport. That day and the next was a full day of travelling and even than I found some time and a way to fit some yoga in, by doing it at the airport in the Dominica Republic.
The last few days I have been doing yoga again, so actually I only skipped two days since I started my challenge. But skipping is skipping. To give myself a new challenge I’m going to do yoga for 365 days in a row. This time I allow myself to do pranayama, to meditate and to sing mantra’s as well. My body needs a rest every now and then so I don’t have to do asanas every day. But I have to do yoga for at least half an hour.
To prevent me from failing I’m going to do my yoga as much as possible early morning. I think that’s the trick. On my last challenge it became too often something I still had to do, although it was the nicest thing I could do that day. But a lot of times there were more ‘important’ things to do. By doing it early morning I know for sure I can ‘thick’ yoga of my to do list.
Start of the challenge is today, 28 of October. So one day down, only 364 more to go.